Friday, April 27, 2012

It's Friday Let's Dance


It's Friday night out here on the west coast of North Korea. Time for some music and a movie. I love the musical works of Henry Mancini, soldiers, and pretty girls. What could be better than a movie with all three? Soldiers, girls, and Mr Mancini's music! Tonight's offering is "Soldier in the Rain". How about Steve McQueen and Jackie Gleason? Tom Poston & Tuesday Weld? Even Adam West (Batman)? Like those folks? Boy, I sure do! You know, I've met all kinds of people in the US Army and saw soldiers make unlikely friends... but friends, really good friends, none the less. Being thrown together in the military will do that to you. "Soldier in the Rain" is a classic, in the demonstration, understanding, and makeup of unlikely pairs. God bless all our US Armed Forces personnel and their families LOOONG time!!! Keep 'em in your prayers and have a wonderful weekend everyone! That's an order! JG ;)

Wednesday, April 25, 2012

Bill Clinton on Mad Cow Disease Outbreak

BREAKING NORTH KOREAN NEWS! A case of MCD (mad cow disease) has been identified in the communist-controlled Central Valley town of Hanford, Koweefornia. This is JihadGene's infamous A.O. (area of operations) and base camp! Our Norko News Gals interviewed former US President, Bill Clinton, about this mad developement. When asked about it, Clinton said, "Look, I know Gene, and I have talked to him about this. Gene assured me that he never laid a hand on any Kings County dairy bovine." When asked about a possible outbreak of MSD (mad sheep disease) in the area, Clinton said"If it happens, I don't think you could pin that on Gene. I mean, I may be from Arkansas, but I don't think the good people of California are gonna believe those lying sheep."
That is all.

Tuesday, April 24, 2012

Answered Prayer Evan Pertile

Evan Pertile
Click HERE if you don't know Evan Pertile. He's a an Army strong soldier and a trooper if ever there was one, LOOONG time!!! His MRI came back clean! No cancer! He grew 3 inches in six months! No growth hormones needed! Evan's spine grew! This is all great news and proof that God does answer our prayers!


Meanwhile....somewhere near Bakersfield, North Korea (California) we find Old  Man Gene (not OMG) on an old Army issue field radio with an important call to God.
GENE: Lord Six Almighty, this is Gene 3 (Earnhardt's #) . How do you read me, over?
GOD: (thunder clap) Gene, I got your transmission "lima charlie hotel mike" (loud & clear, how me?), over.
GENE: Got you same-same, Lord. Sir, I just wanted to thank you LOOONG time, Father....I mean...what a great way to start out my Tuesday morning...what with the good report on Evan's progress and all.! Lord of All, you answered our prayers in a big way! Over... 
GOD: This is the Great I am to Gene...Evan has proved just that! That I, the Lord God Almighty, answer the prayers of soldiers. You copy? Over...
GENE:  Good copy, Lord. Father, do you even answer the prayers of heathen Marines, too?
GOD: Lord Six to Gene. The Great I am answers the prayers of all branches of the US Armed Forces. Over... 
GENE: Even the damn Navy, Lord?! Stoopid Squids!!! Oops...sorry Lord...I think Satan is jamming my frequency...over...
GOD: This is The Lord to Gene. The devil tends to do that. Still mad about those Army vs Navy games, huh Gene? Over...
GENE: Yeah, Lord...do you think you can hook us up with a good assault in the next Army-Navy game, Lord? Over.
GOD: Lord Six to Gene...as you well know...I don't work like that! But... be advised, I will be monitoring all of Evan's Army frequencies 24/7 and I am ALWAYS...repeat...ALWAYS on station! My blessings to you all. Lord Six Almighty, out. (thunder clap)
GENE: Thanks again, Father. I'll continue the mission praying for Evan and his family on my end. Gene, out.

Saturday, April 21, 2012

Surprise!
















Unfortunately this fell on a Saturday and my Senators (BOXER & FEINSTEIN) are unavailable for testing. Oh well, have a great weekend and keep our US Armed Forces and their families in your prayers LOOONG time!!!

Wednesday, April 18, 2012

Obama Hires New Directors

BREAKING NORTH KOREAN NEWS!
US President, Barack Whosenamed Obama, has announced today new Directors of the Secret Service and the GSA...the appointees are Tiger Woods and Dennis Rodman. Which slot? Your choice. That is all.

Saturday, April 14, 2012

North Korea Announces Big Sale


Hi, how's yo Mama, and welcome to KIM Jong Un's DPRKbay store! If you've been searching the Wirl Why Webb for slightly used, wet, fire and smoke damaged wocket parts...then, search no more! Urethra! You found it, LOOONG time!!! For ownree $225 (US currency) we offer FREE shipping and handling! No cheap South Korean Samsung shit! This is Chinese and Iranian 1st quality merchandise only! Playpal accepted! KIM Jong Un is a registered sex offender and DPRK-bay Power Seller with zero negative feedback! Shop with us and have a wonderful weekend LOOONG time!!!

Friday, April 13, 2012

It's Friday the 13th! Let's Dance!


It's Friday??? School kids love Friday's too! Our son is a Sophomore in high school. Listening to him and his gal friends...I realize how much about the fair sex he has learned this past school year. It ain't all that much... but the boy in this video soooooo reminds me of him, LOOONG time!!! It's Friday the 13th...so be careful out there! Could be some zombies lurking! Always expect the unexpected! Here's hoping your week was a good one, despite life's wocket launch failures! Please remember our wonderful US Armed Forces and their families LOOONG time!!! Keep them in your prayers and have a wonderful Zombie Free Friday! Let's dance!

Thursday, April 12, 2012

North Korea Declares War on Nascar!


After North Korea's dismal failure of a rocket launch today, Supreme Leader, KIM Jong Un has declared war on NASCAR, all of it's fans, and especially the late Dale Earnhardt #3.
(note lucky number on rocket)

KIM Jong Un's Rocket Launch Fails



This is "launch finger" for launching of wockets! It never touch "splode" button, I'm swears it! Son of a beach my life, LOOONG time!!!











Meanwhile...back at the Secretary of State's Office...
...I got your "splode" finger, Kim!

Friday, April 6, 2012

It's Friday! Let's Dance and Let it Happen!

By golly it's Friday! A wild weather week. I lit a fire in our wood burning stove this morning because it was down to 38F here, in Central California. Heck, on Easter Sunday it's going to be 80 degrees...I can handle that! So anyway, here's a song my lovely wife, the ruvly Kim, and I danced to this cool but wonderful Friday springtime morning. When I was first dating my wife back in April 1975, I kept playing this song over and over, in my G.I. brain..."Let it Happen"...I wished....let it happen...I prayed. Well, what do you know? Prayers do get answered! LOOONG time!!! But..be careful what you pray for. I got lucky! Yes I did, LOOONG time!!! So this Easter give thanks, give love, send prayers, and remember our US Armed Forces and their families very LOOONG time!!! Day in and day out. God bless you all. It's Friday, so grab someone ya love and let's dance! Have a wonderful weekend. JG;)