Friday, December 18, 2009

KIM Jong IL Writes a Letter

Meanwhile at his elevated desk...comfortably seated in his leather highchair, we find Norf Korea's Great Reader KIM Jong IL composing a letter. Let's take a look...

KIM- Okray, Secretary General Wong. You have pencils and papers weddy to take dicks-tation from Great Reader?

WONG- Ready for dictation, Sir!

KIM- Good then let's begin...How's it hangin', BLITCH?! No...stwike that.

WONG- I'll strike that, Great One.

KIM- What's crack-a-lackin', BLITCH?! No...stwike that, too!

WONG- Consider it struck, Your Greatness.

KIM- Stop with dicks-tation, Secretary General Wong!

WONG- Dictation stopped, Sir.

KIM- I think I'll go for a more formal gweeting:


...blah-blah-blah...etc...LOL...ROFLMAO...craygee mudder-pucker make Great reader KIM Jong IL raff out roud looong time...I'm have nots raffed out so roud as when I'm read latest letter from stoopid mudder-puckin Obama!!! LOL!!! What chew been smokin, Dude?
LOL LONG TIME!!!...etc...etc...

Signed, Great Reader KIM Jong IL,
Dickstater, DPRK...etc,etc.."

KIM- You got all that, Secretary General Wong?

WONG- Yes, Sir!

KIM- Good.

WONG- Where's this letter going to, Great Reader?

KIM- Going to the USA...hmmm...Better put some extra Blue Chip Stamps or S & H green ones on the envelope for postage!

WONG- Yes, Sir...and to whom is this letter going to, Sir?

KIM- The "to whom's" is Senator Chuck Schumer of course!

WONG- I should have known.

KIM- Now that I have my highchair tray in the down position...goes get me a rum & coke, BLITCH!!! BWAHAhahaha!!!

WONG- A flight attendant's work is never done.

(*blitch is Korean for the Engrish word if you didn't nose ;)


innominatus said...

Wow. Me and Great Reader on exactly same page raffing at Chuck Schumer!

PS - Dunno if you ever saw it, but Great Reader showed up at my site last summer. He pretty much stole the show.

Snarky Basterd said...

Need more bitches!

JihadGene said...

Writing this stuff is a real bitch!

Kid said...

Damn that Bitch !

Chucky, If it weren't for dumbasses, you'd be working at Wendy's .. if you were lucky.

pamibe said...

"What's crack-a-lackin', BLITCH?!"

ROFL! You're at the top of your game, Great Reader!! :D

Anonymous said...

... bhwhahahaah!..... another classic...


buffalodick said...

I'm clueless on this one...

USA_Admiral said...

Another great one you Excellency.

Lily said...

I wish you and your family a really nice Chritsmas! enjoy yourselves and have fun!


Kid said...

Hey Gene, I think that chick on the left really likes talking care of the great reader..
The other.. her mind is elsewhere.

ParachuteCutie said...

Dear friend,

Wishing you, your lovely wife and your son a VERY MERRY CHRISTMAS. I hope that the New Year brings you all excellent health, much happiness and prosperity.

LUV you LOOOOONG time!

H2o said...

I bet this is a blitch to write but it sure is funny. You need to come up with a couple more words for SOB.