Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Somali Pirate Song or Money for Nothing


Remember that song "Money for Nothing" by Dire Straits? You know...I want my MTV and all of that? Sure ya do! So I wrote this here song through the sand-filled eyes of Iranian Freedom Fighters (AKA: terrorists) Abdul and Mohammad, on location (redeployed) in Iraq...

(*Abdul sings to Mohammad)

I want to,
I want to,
I want to be Somali...

I want to,
I want to,
I want to be Somali...

Now look at them Muslim brothers
That's the way you do it
You play buccaneer like that Somali
That ain't working, that's the way you do it
Money from the Great Satan and your Virgins almost for free

Now that ain't working, that's the way you do it
Let me tell you them Pirates ain't dumb
Maybe catch a head-shot from some Navy frigate
Maybe get off with only a cut left thumb

We got to do the will of Allah
Custom weapons deliveries
We got to kill Allah's agitators
We got to clean all these R.P.G.'s

The little pirate with the earring and the makeup
Yeah Mohammad, that's his own teeth
That little pirate got his own jet airplane (ride)
That little pirate even get's B.L.T.'s (sorry Allah)

(*Abdul and Mohammad sing together)

We got to do the will of Allah
Custom weapons deliveries
We got to kill Allah's agitators
We got to clean these R.P.G.'s

We got to do the will of Allah
Custom weapons deliveries
We got to kill Allah's agitators
We got to clean these R.P.G.'s

(*Mohammad sings to Abdul)

Look at that, look at that
I should have learned to talk like a pirate
I should have learned to dance a jig
Look at that punk-ass pirate, grinnin at the cameras
While we sweat our balls off, here...chewin on figs
And Obama's up there, what's that? Hawaiian noises?
Shakin' hands like a fuckin chimpanzee (Oooo...I said chimpanzee)
Oh, that ain't working, that's the way you do it
Get your power from ACORN and your bailouts for free (not free for taxpayers)

(*Abdul busts-up and joins Mohammad in song)

We got to do the will of Allah
Custom weapons deliveries
We got to kill Allah's agitators
We got to clean these R.P.G.'s

Listen here
Now that ain't working, that's the way you do it
You play the Pirate on the NBC
That ain't working, that's the way you do it
Food for nothing and your cell (jail) for free
Clothing for nothing and running water for free

Get your prayer mat for nothing, get your Korans for free
Clean sheets for nothing, pen & paper for free

Look at that, look at that
Get your TV for nothing, get your basketball for free
(I want to, I want to, I want to be Somali)
Law library for nothing and the ACLU to help you get out for free

Easy, easy

That ain't working

15 comments:

Hammer said...

Another winner!

you're on a roll.

That pirate could eat an apple through chicken wire.

H2o said...

You crack me up...

The_Kid said...

JG, You're in the zone baby.

Here's Mark Knofler playing some guitar with Mr Guitar
LINKImagine all the Piruts
at the bottom
of the sea...

The_Kid said...

Wonder why my comment text got all scrunched up.

I think it's Obama.

USA_Admiral said...

That one is a hoot!

Anonymous said...

My word you're on a roll of cleverness that is leaving us in the dust!

I laughed. I cried. I wanted to strangle a pirate.

Bravo, JG!


Deltabravo

Retired Navy CPO said...

Ya, thanks for that. Now I'll have that song in my head all day.

buffalodick said...

When is the CD coming out?

Cappy said...

Shiver me timbers. I'm too tired to shiver 'em myself.

Teresa said...

I think Jimbo (PRS) and Denny (GOC) need a copy of these lyrics then they can play and sing this at the next blog meet. ROFLMAO.

Elm said...

Are you Weird Al? I'm lovin' that song! You should do a Youtube video of it!

JihadGene said...

Elm- I'm not Weird Al...I'm just weird as Weird Al, that's all.

Deadman said...

Damn that guy needs to see a dentist. I'm surfe Obama will hook him up courtesy of you and me...

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