Monday, March 3, 2014

Obama Warns Putin

BREAKING NORF KOREAN NEWS!!! The Kenyan-American President, Barack Whosenamed Obama has just issued a stern warning to Russia's President Putin! 

Obama is shown here drawing a red line in the sand. President Obama said, "I want to make it perfectly clear, to President Putin and to the people of Russia, that the invasion of Augusta's National Golf Course prior to completion of the 2014 Masters Tournament, will result in an American declaration of war!"  

That is all. ;)

Wednesday, February 12, 2014

Life Lessons

So far... this work week has been a pain in the buttocks! Think I'll relax and have some ice's Gump Day! So will you make the rest of your day and work week happy or crappy? I pray you choose happy and hang in there LOOONG time!!! It'll get better.  

Wednesday, February 5, 2014

KIM Jong Un CVS Pharmacy Super Bowl

Meanwhile...somewhere north of the 38th Parallel...the Great Reader of Norf Korea, KIM Jong Un weighs in with his own observations on CVS Pharmacy's decision to discontinue tobacco sales in all of it's 7,600 stores. Let's hear what Great Reader has to say...

KIM:  Looks, General Wang! Looks! (Kim pointing to a DPRK version of Weekly Reader Magazine

WANG: What is it, Great One?

KIM:  I'm gonna make us witch, LOOONG time!!! 

WANG:  Witch, Sir? You mean "WITCH" as in flying monkeys and the Yellow Brick Road, Sir?

KIM:  No, no...LOOONG time NOSE!!! I'ms not tawkin about Wizzar Odds and frying monkeys...I'm tawkin about US dollah! CASH money! Look at head-rhine in magazine!

WANG:  Hmmm...It says that CVS Pharmacy is no longer selling tobacco in it's stores. So???

KIM:  So we're WITCH!

WANG:  Sir, how does that make us rich? 

KIM:  CBS Farmsee has to replace empty shelf space with some-ting, right?

WANG:  Well yes, Sir...but with what? 

KIM: Happy smoke from the good old DPRK!

WANG:  You mean marijuana, Sir? 

KIM:   Blingo, Wang! We grows it and they buys it! 

WANG:   Pot is illegal in the US. Have you been talking to Dennis Rodman again, Sir?

KIM:   No... but I have some seeds left over from his cigar! And happy smoke is not ill-eagle in 
            Seahawk and Denver Blanco states! Did you not see the Super Blow on TV with me???

WANG:   Well yes but...

KIM:   What a cruster fruck! You can't tell me those NFL CEO's wasn't high on that kwap!
             Shehawks vs Blancos. What a joke! And just rook at America's readership! John Kerry...
             Brunos Mars...John McCain...Miley Cypress! I'm telling you General Wang, happy smoke will 
             soon be completely legalalienized throughout all 53 states and the DPRK will deriver the
             goods! LOOONG time!!! Now go get me a kimchi pizza!

WANG:  Very good, Sir.

Friday, January 31, 2014

Happy New Year

In Korea, it was New Years yesterday. Today it's our turn! Have a happy not crappy New Year! May you be filled with the joy of the Great Reader and Dennis Rodman, LOOONG time!!!

Sunday, January 19, 2014

North Korea's Best Friends

BREAKING NORF KOREAN NEWS! With the announcement of Dennis Rodman's entering a rehab shortly after his return home from the glorious basketsball playing DPRK, our Great New Reader, Dicktater KIM Jong Un has announced a new best American friend four life! LOOONG time!!! 

                                  Meet, Richard Sherman.
                                          GO DENVER! 

Tuesday, December 31, 2013

Happy not Crappy New Year!

Greetings from the Norf Korean California Camp of Great Reader-JihadGene! This year there has been plenty to be LOOONG time thankful for!!! For one, I'm thankful that I'm not the uncle of the DPRK's  KIM Jong Un or Dennis Rodman. Oh well... May you have wockets 'a plenty in 2014 and never have the need to use them! Ruv you LOOONG time!!!-JG

Friday, December 20, 2013

Dennis Rodman and Camp 14

It's a Friday and I'm not dancing today. Sorry but today is a must read. A read about a former North Korean from Camp 14 and a message for Dennis Rodman.  Click the link HERE
Thank you. JG