Monday, March 29, 2010

Dear Allah


Dear Allah,

Sir, kindly just knock my ass the F@CK out and get this shit over with!!! Sunday night another group of THREE...count 'em...THREE!!!...this time Hispanics... (AKA: The 3 Amigos) broke the lower glass of the front door on our store at approximately 10:30 PM. You know, Allah? That same glass I had replaced only last week because of a similar break in (same location on the glass door)? It was only last Sunday night/early Monday morning at midnight. Remember that? Then...it was 3 black guys, The 3 A-Negroes, who got into our store, now... it's Hispanic kids who tried to break in, but couldn't gain a joyous shopping entry because of the bars I had placed on the door. Apparently "The 3 Amigos" did not talk to "The 3 Ah-Negroes" and get briefed about the newly installed bars. I'm being attacked in three's!! WTF, Allah?! I couldn't make this shit up if I wanted to!!! If shit happens in 3's what's next, Allah?! Allah, if it ain't too much to ask for, could you have all heathens involved be shit on and then eaten by a herd of wild Russian-strain boars? With my luck you'll just send me the 3 Little Pigs. Jeez! Praise be to Allah and all that crap, but help me out. So far, I score it... Seoul Brudders 1, Hispanic Homies 0, and our clothing store, Fashion Thug, out $870 (US).

Your Faithful & Pissed off Servant,
JihadGene

10 comments:

innominatus said...

During the Rodney King riots in LA, Korean shopowners took positions on rooftops and shot at looters. Dunno how legal that is, but it sounds both entertaining and educational.

JihadGene said...

Inn- I remember it well and it gives me a *smile*. Thanx.

Barco Sin Vela II said...

Claymores.

Homemade Claymores...

Made from shotgun shells

and nails

Gore.

Vixen said...

I love "be shit on and then eaten by a herd of wild Russian-strain boars" it sounds like a perfect punishment.

Although if you want to go with the roof-top shooting thing, I am more than sure my hubs would be glad to join you.

BostonMaggie said...

Sorry to hear about your break-ins!
Here's a little something to cheer you up -
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wgrrQwLdME8&feature=player_embedded#

The_Kid said...

Well, that's a real pisser. Maybe these bozo's will get the word out that you can't get in.

Maybe put a nightlight so the punks could see the bars.

How about a sign that says Electrified Glass 240 Volts.

A claymore filled with the big nasty.

pamibe said...

Well that just sucks. I vote for the rooftop snipers.

Teresa said...

I love the rooftop sniper thing too. However, just to discourage a certain segment... you may want to put up a sign at night saying, "Attention! Bacon grease applied today."

heh.

Snarky Basterd said...

You needs to sit in a chair in that store with an AK-47 in your lap, waiting for the next time they come.

Kanani said...

More than likely some of these little shits have walked by casing it out. Sorry this is happening!