Wednesday, March 18, 2009

JihadGene Talks to God


I talk to God. I'll let you in for a listen...

JG- JihadGene to SHOT-CALLER SIX... (Also known as: God)...What up?! Hope all is good in da hood with you and yours...got some time for me? My 8 digit grid coordinates (location) is located near Fresno, California. Got a minute, God? Over....

God- Roger that Gene! How's my signal, over?

JG- Lord, you're "blowin smoke" (loud signal)! You're coming in "Lickin' Chicken Ho Chi Min" ("Loud and Clear How Me"), over?...

God- Roger, got you Lickin' Chicken (loud & clear). What did you want to "Chatty Cathy" (talk) about, Gene? Bring it on back (answer back), over...

JG- All this bailout stuff (sh!t) has got me a bit angered (p!ssed off). I mean Obama (the as$hole) and the Democrats (fellow as$holes) in Congress (f*ckin snakes) and the Senate (sum-b!tching leeches) are bad mouthing AIG for $160 million in bonuses while they, in government, are pouring out billions of our tax dollars. I'm ticked (mad as hell) and ready to pop some CS (tear gas) on their worthless heathen butts, over...

God- Roger. Are you going "bucket mouth" (potty mouth) on me, Soldier? Over.

JG- Oh....NEGATORY (no)...No, No, NO!...Big Kahuna Six! But now hear this, Lord...President OBAMA is considering having our wounded war Veterans pay for their HEALTH CARE !!! Over...

God- This is SIX, Is that right JG?! Well, I need to do some work in Washington. Gene, you just settle down and know that "I" am in control, over...

JG- Roger that, Great I am! Over...

God- Roger, JG. Well, I gotta pack it in (end this transmission) and put some whoop ass in Washington D.C. so you be cool JG and remember that what goes around comes back around. I'll take care of our wounded Veterans. In the meantime you call your representatives and let 'em know how you feel. Try and keep it clean...over...

JG- That's a big Roger-Dodger, Lord...and thank you, Sir...over...

God- I'm always here, Gene. Always! SHOT CALLER SIX, out.

JG- I'll remember that, Lord. JihadGene, out.

6 comments:

G-Man said...

Gene....You so funny!!!!

Also, I think Hornswaggle is great!

Carry On....G

Anonymous said...

Gene!

Did you hear that the stimulus bill specifically stated in black, white and vampire blood, that "All contracted bonuses prior to Feb 2009 would be paid".

You know the stimulus bill Congress made up on Obama's watch.
The one they all voted for.
The one Obama signed (but probably didn't read)

Man, I hate those effing whores.
How could you be Liddy and stay quiet while some ugly greedy vampire dude senator is suggesting all your execs should have committed hary cary, after it was them that destroyed the entire global economic system.

I'd be going down hard my friend. H A R D.

The rest of my comments are not suitable for public consumption.

cb

PMS - Oh, and their solution to punishing the evil AIG execs is when they give AIG the NEXT 30 BILLION, they're gonna deduct the 165 Million.

Wild Hysterical Laugher followed by unmentionables.

Anonymous said...

Today some hapless telemarketer trying to get pledges for the Republican party called my house asking if I would donate $100 to help protect the country from the Democrats.

I let her have an earful of why I'm not giving money to anyone. I said they already picked my pocket. And they've proven that throwing money at a problem doesn't fix it so don't ask for my money to fix their election issues.

She kept trying to talk me down... 75, 50...25. I laughed at her and told her no way. I want them all to be defeated and the only thing that will protect them from Nanny and Company would be to get a few democrats to come to their side. But they're all worthless.... She finally let me go. But I get the feeling I wasn't the first to make her sorry she was a telemarketer trying to raise campaign money.

Give me someone worth voting for dammit!

DeltaBravo

Yeah... I needed to gripe. But it wasn't as bad as the funeral home telemarketer who wanted to know if I'd buy a prepaid funeral plan to save my family worries and hassle. I told him when I died I wanted it to be a real tragedy and I wanted to inconvenience everyone. He quickly bid me a good day and hung up. Gosh. Some people!

Hammer said...

10-4 good buddy!

Richmond said...

Amen JG. Amen... Good grief - what a mess this all is...

Anonymous said...

.... bwhahaha..... next time you talk to God, ask him who he picked for his bracket.....

Eric