In Arab News Today

Since Barrack "Who's-Named" Obama has begun his Mid-Eastern Tour d' Kools (sponsored by Rezko J. Reynolds Tobacco Company) an increase in "Arab" crime has been noted here at Great Reader Headquarters. We don't know if it is a direct result of Obama's visit to the middle-east region or just another case of Global Warming. Pictured here on Great Reader, is Arab High School's own Senior High Graduate, the 18 year old Mr. Hon Orr Stewdent.
It seems Stewdent has been arrested for shooting the "banana", which in Arabic means "the finger", at his Principal, Don Imus, during the Arab graduation ceremony. Stewdent further disrupted a reading of the Koran, wiped his feet on prayer rugs, cursed his family (who apparently are Obama supporters), and called them all a bunch of "Himey-Town sons of bitches who he'd rather cut the balls off of, with a rusty Lady Schick, rather than look at". Before Arab P.D. arrived Mr Stewdent allegedly took a swing at Arab's revered Mullah, Al Sharpton, who countered the blow by striking Stewdent with his bullhorn. Sharpton yelled, "take that you nappy-headed hoe" and knocked that muh-fu*ker right out!

*As if my twisted story from The Arab Tribune isn't bad enough-

Michael Keith Gilley, 51, of Hog Jaw Road was arrested for DUI following a traffic stop on Hog Jaw Road about 1:41 p.m. May 31.

*That's right...Hog Jaw Road in Arab, Alabama. Have they no respect for Arabs in the naming of their streets? Roll Tide!!!

Praise Allah and good night!
JihadGene

Woman in the Street Interview- Afghani Women Hate Obama

JihadGene here with a woman on the street interview in Afghanistan...

JG- So your name is?...

LADY- Bashasha Amal Smith.

JG- I believe that is an Islamic name, is it not?

LADY- For the most parts.

JG- What does your Islamic name mean?

LADY- Well, Bashasha means cheerfullness.

JG- Go on...

LADY- Amal means hope.

JG- And "Smith", what does that mean?

LADY- It means I'm using an alias, you dumb shit.

JG- Oh. Very good then. So Amal means hope?

LADY- Did I do a "Mel Tillis" and stutter, asshole?

JG- Oh. No, Mam.

LADY- That's better, freak.

JG- Are you sure that your first name, Bashasha, means cheerfullness? It doesn't seem...

LADY- Where, in. the. hell., are you going with this?! I put my chick-pea fried ass on the line to talk with you and all you wanna do is talk about my Islamic name?! The Taliban ain't exactly cool with us Afghan women talking to strangers, ya know?! You here to ask me about that Barrack Hussein Obama guy, or what?

JG- Well yes. But I don't get all your...shall I say...resentment?

LADY- Call it what it is, JG. It's anger, damn it!

JG- Very well. Are you then angry because Obama has come to visit your people in Afghanistan?

LADY- You bet your sweet ass I am!

JG- But...

LADY- Look here, fool! Whenever I bow and pray towards Mecca, I see the big US Air Base over there across from my 225 square foot, Habeeb-Built Mud-Mansionett hut. When I saw all the Iron Birds coming in earlier today, plus the helicopters, not to mention all the big Chevy SUV's, and added security in the air and on the ground....well I just put 2 and 2 together! But I never thought it would be this elephant-eared f*ck-face named Obama! Mutha-F*cka! I'm pissed! Naturally, I was let down. Who wouldn't be?! Damn it! May Obama suckle on all of Jimmy Dean's pure-pork sausage-laden sow's for this!

JG- Well, then... just who...or what, did you think was coming in?

LADY- The WWE, of course.

JG- The WWE?

LADY- You know...the WORLD WRESTLING ENTERTAINMENT! They only been here about a hundred times!... unlike that chicken-shit Obama. Hope & change, my ass!!! I wants some more of that WWE action!!!
I'm talking Undertaker! Jessie & Festus! The Samoan Luv Daddy, Umaga! Randy Orton! Big Show! The Punjabi Ass-Pounder hisself ,The Great Kahli! Mr Kennedy! Shelton Benjamin! Kofi Kingston! Matt & Jeff Hardy! Batista! Triple H! Sean Michaels! Mark Henry! Ray Mysterio, and "EDGE"...he autographed my thong!!! Did I tell ya about the time I woke up with this killer hang-over, and my burka up over my head? Seems Finlay and Hornswoggle made an honorary Leprechaun outta me! WooooWeee, what a night! Say, you aren't gonna print this shit are ya? I gotta go. You never talked to me. C ya!

JG- This pretty-much concludes the interview, I'd say.

Great Reader Pays Tribute to Hammer

Great Reader KIM Jong IL here. People's...if your day starts out just rike mines does, then you have a day saturn-rated (saturated) wiff bullock's dong, also's known to American's as boo-shit, or B.S.. I find this writer of boo-shit is superior to any (Bwee S) I have never read! Anyone's who can get "a blind pimps Cadillac", Foster Brooks, TV Preachers, Spongeblob Squareplants, Cialis, and (mind you) a "diseased moose cock"...all into one post is a Bad Mammer-Jammer and has The People's respect! I clommand you to go now and read, B.S. part 1 and Even more B.S. , at the brogg called "When Your Only Tool is a Hammer
Enjoy Looong Time!
Great Reader

It's Friday! Let's Dance!

It's "not unusual" to enjoy some Tom Jones! But first make sure nobodies home and pull down the shades. Now get up from that keyboard, get off of that government money-maker, and dance with The Great Reader!

A Message from Baghdad Bob

I don't care about what you think you have seen or read on this blogg...
JihadGene LOVES his family!!! As much as Uday loves Qusay! As much as O.J. loves hunting down the real killers and eating jail food! More than Gene loves to listen to his brother-in-law, Mr Know-It-All, reciting some bullshit statistics on todays economy, or asking why don't we manufacture nuclear powered cars, ranges, and recliners? JihadGene Loves his family more than Lake Tahoe! More than any of the other HOE's, in all the world, as well! Praise Allah, and may pig piss be upon all of you non-believers!!!

*This is just the disclaimer. Scroll down for the rest of the story...

Bayoneted or E-mail from a Jackass

Don't you just love it when someone sticks a bayonet in you and treats ya like a Jap on
Iwo Jima? My bayonet came in the form of this e-mail...

Gene,
We're leaving this morning for Tahoe.
Blah-Blah-Blah.

*this means that my little sister (AKA nurse Ratchet) and her husband (AKA Mr Know-It-All)
will be in Tahoe having a great time with Jackass (the writer of this e-mail) and her husband, Goodguy.

So and So (another relative) has the next week but can't use it, so we're staying an extra
week.
Blah-Blah-Blah.

*this means I am even more envious/pissed because I know that Mr Know-It-All will have even more time to stay in beautiful Lake Tahoe for freezie's.

We'll be home on July 28.
Blah-Blah-Blah.

*This means where I live, we will be frying (not raisins) in the sun, while the weather is perfect in Tahoe with nice cool nights. Later they'll probably be sitting near a fireplace, drinking wine, and listening to Mr Know-It-All talk of things no one could give a shit less about.

Hope all's well with you.
Blah-Blah-Blah.

*This means eat your heart out suck'a.


Love you lots,
Jackass (name changed to protect the innocent)


p.s. Keep on blogging!

*This means Jackass has written Zero, Zilch, Nothin, Na-frickin-da...on her blog since June 25th and leaves me with the encouraging words "Keep on blogging".
Yeah. I'm still blogging. I love you too Carol...er...Jackass. I just know I'm gonna pay for this. What the hell. heh-heh.

Barrack Who's-Named Obama Speaks

(AP) Obama said adhering to nonproliferation treaties would put pressure on nations such as North Korea and Iran. North Korea has tested a nuclear weapon and Iran has an energy program the Bush administration warns could be a precursor to nuclear weapon development.

*It's Jimmy Carter all over again.

Meanwhile somewhere in Peace Ruving and Wocket Launching Norf Korea, we find Great Reader KIM Jong Il, raffing his ass off...

KIM- Read that to me again, General Wang.

WANG- Yes, Great One. Barrack "Who' s-Named" Obama said, and I quote, "Adhering to nonproliferation treaties would put pressure on nations such as North Korea and Iran".

KIM- BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

WANG- And according to (AP) ...Two goals of his administration would be to secure all loose nuclear material during his first term and to rid the world of nuclear weapons, Obama told an audience before a roundtable discussion at Purdue University.

KIM- BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Where the f*ck is Purdue University?

WANG- I believe it's in Plains, Georgia...Your Greatness.