Thursday, December 29, 2011

New Title for KIM Jong Un

The North Korean Generals have changed KIM Jong Un's title, yet again. Click here. So...okay, now instead of "Great Suxccessor" KIM Jong Un is now called something else. Therefore...when President Obama comes to bow down and kiss KIM Jong Un's hand...or... "other" body parts...he should refer to him as the "SuperMe Reader". That is all.

Wednesday, December 28, 2011

Jed Clampett Attends Funeral of Great Reader KIM Jong IL

North Korea's Great Suxccessor, KIM Jong Un loves the Beverly Hillbillies LOOONG time!!! a final farewell salute to his father the Great Reader, KIM Jong IL...had him delivered to the gravesite in "Hillbilly Style". We now resume our normal programming.

Tuesday, December 27, 2011

KIM Jong IL's Body Ready for Funeral

The Great Suxccessor, KIM Jong Un, son of Great Reader, KIM Jong IL, gives special thanks to the Pyongyang Taxidermy & Make Up Plant#7 for the bang-up job they did on his Father! See photo. Word has it that the Great Suxccessor will have the Hip-Hop Group, "LMF(DPRK)AO" perform their hit single, "I'm Sexy and I'm Nose it"... LOOONG Time!!! That is all. JG ;)

Monday, December 19, 2011

The Final Moments of KIM Jong IL a land far away...only hours ago...Norf Korea's Great Reader KIM Jong IL's last moments on planet Earf are spent with his aide de camp, 7 star General Wang. Let's listen in...

WANG: Great Reader, Sir! Before you go...there is something the North Korean people must know!

KIM: I'm goner LOOONG time, General Wang!!! I'm nose it. I'm fading fast but I'm try to hangs in there for one last question befloor I'm kicks eternal bucket. What is question?

WANG: What title shall we give KIM Jong Un when he takes over, Sir?

KIM: WTF?! My son, KIM Jong Un takes charge???!!! Oh GREAT!!! That SUCKS!!! Frickin MESS!!! My life is OVER!!!

(KIM expires)

(General Wang dutifully writes in notebook, "Great Successor")

Author's note- And now you nose, the rest of the story. JG;)

Sunday, December 18, 2011

Message to America from KIM Jong Un

"Lady GaGa must sings at mine father's funeral on December 28th, 2011...or else." -Fresh Prince of Hot Air (DPRK), KIM Jong Un

KIM Jong IL Dead LOOONG Time

KIM Jong UN to General Wang upon hearing the news of his Father's death:
"You wooden be boo-shittin' me would you???!!!"

According to the North Korean news Dear Leader KIM Jong IL is dead. He died from "overwork". Keeping that in mind, my lovely wife just informed me that I will "obviously " live to a ripe old age!

Friday, December 16, 2011

It's Friday Let's Dance and Shop!!!

My sisters are getting the same present this year! My Elder Sister Carol has already received her gift and my nephew has learned to feed it dust bunnies! So my little sister gets one too! I've incorporated their Christmas gift hints into this rewritten song, and along with it, the pains of Christmas expenses on a Norf Korean budget. I expect this to be an Amazon classic some I've ordered their gifts from Amazon. As always, let's keep our brave US Armed Forces in our prayers along with their families LOOONG time!!! It's Friday! Let's sing and dance to this version of "Rawhide" rewritten by yours truly, JihadGene!

Vacuum Vacuum Vacuum
Vacuum Vacuum Vacuum
Vacuum Vacuum Vacuum
Vacuum Vacuum Vacuum...ROOMBA!

I keep spendin' spendin' spendin'
Like my credit card was stolen
I'm afraid the wife is gonna have my hide!

Through pain and words and weather...
...hell, just whatever...
I hope that this Christmas...
She'll let me slide

All the things I'm a missin'
Common sense and her good kissin'
are waiting at the end of my (PayPal) ride

Move it on. Finish up. Gotta go! Don't cha know? My hide!
Move 'em out....gotta go...UPS don't ya know?
No one likes American Express...that blows!

Friday, December 9, 2011

It's Friday Let's Dance and Deploy

Today's Let's Dance is dedicated to #1) My lovely wife and #2) to our deployed troops. Man, if ever there was a homesick GI love song to his very special girl...this is it.! My wife (The Lovely Kim) has deployed to South Korea for our niece's wedding. A quick one week visit and then back to work. It's a Christmas present she has earned LOOONG time!!! My little dog's (Trouble's) knee is much better but...just the same... I'm gonna pick him up...and gently dance with him, to this beautiful song. God bless all of our troops and their families! Keep them all in your prayers and have a wonderful weekend people! I think I'm KIM Jong IL and I approve of this message LOOONG time!!!

Friday, December 2, 2011

It's Friday! Let's Dance!! Dog Gone It!!!

Got dogs? We do. They are a part of our family. My flying Shit-zoo (I know it's spelled differently), named "Trouble" is getting old, like me, and has blown out a knee. He has been on pain meds since Monday and dog-gone if he isn't doing much better and now may not need surgery, since he is a rather small dog. I sure hope so! Well, all of you critter people out there... and military dog handler types....pick up a pooch and dance because...after is Friday! God bless all our US Armed Forces and their families very LOOONG time and remember "Toys for Tots" while you're out Christmas shopping this weekend!!!