Friday, October 10, 2008

North Korean Economy Soars DPRK No Longer Axis of Evil


Meanwhile somewhere NORTH of the 38th Parallel in a land once known as "The Land of the Morning Missile Launch" we find Norf Korea's Great Reader, KIM Jong IL with his aide-de-camp, 7 Star General Wang, feeling better and on the docks at Nampo City, DPRK inspecting North Korea's latest Halloween shipments bound for Damascus and Tehran...

KIM- (checking shipping docs) Let's see....16,000 eunuchs of Vampliers Brud...

WANG- That's units of Vampire's Blood, Sir. Not eunuchs.

KIM- I knew that! Where's was I... 16,000 units of Vampliers Brud.

WANG- Check.

KIM- 70,000 units of X-Ray Spec's.

WANG- Why so many X Ray Spec's, Sir?

KIM- For looking thru burka's, of course! My numba 1 seller in Islamabad.

WANG- Check.

KIM- Inflatable sheep with thong and veil, the "Ali Baa-Baa" model... 40,000 units.
A sure fire hit with the Taliban!

WANG- No comment....Check.

KIM- 12,000 units of the "Tickle Me Maverick, John McCain VooDoo Economics Doll" which calls US Voters "My Friends" while he simultaneously throws their tax dollars down some rat-hole called Wall Street.

WANG- Oh yeah! Check.

KIM- 12,000 units of "Mega Death Moose-Mauler, Sarah Palin" costume complete with baby seal club, hockey puck, mukluks, AK-47, RPG, high heels, and make up kit w/ fillet knife.

WANG- Check.

KIM- 120 units of Senator Joe "Plugs" Biden costumes. Comes complete with 1% of the US vote.

WANG- He looks like Sam the Eagle to me....check.

KIM- 12,000 units of the "Barry Bendover Obama" costume including one white flag, prayer mat, a pack of Marlboro's, and a tube of KY motion-lotion anal jell. That's gonna be a big hit in the United Nations!

WANG- I must say you look great, Sir! Ever since George W. Bush has considered taking us off the Axis of Evil list, your health is much improved.

KIM- You knows it! President Bush has gone from being a Lame Duck to a mudder-puckin Wooden Decoy!

KIM & WANG- BWAHAhahahaha!!!

KIM- Okray, back to bid-ness......65 SCUDS...

WANG- Check.

KIM- 24 Nodong missiles...

WANG- Check. Wow Sir! We sure can get a lot into these used sea vans. Where did you get them?

KIM- I got a good deal on the internet through the U.S. Naval Air Warfare Center in China Lake. Better than Eblay! Let's see....Where was I....2000 kilos of Kim's Mellow Yellow Cake...

(hat tip to Deltabravo for the heads-up ;) Ruv You Looong Time!!!

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Oh jeez, Great Reader....now I can't see my work through the tears of hysteria. Tickle Me Maverick, bwahahahah....

You just made my Friday perfect and it is only 11am. Me ruv you looong time.

JihadGene said...

Vix-

Ruv you 2! Be sure to scroll down for "It's Friday Let's Dance" music bideo!

Great Reader
KIM Jong IL

Tammi said...

OK good post. FUNNY shit!

BTW - I'm here! *waving* Are you at double digits yet?

JihadGene said...

Tammi- Not yet. Keep it up!

Ruv You Looong Time!
Great Reader
KIM Jong IL

Evil Transport Lady said...

ROFL!!!!!!!!!!!!
"Inflatable sheep with thong and veil, the "Ali Baa-Baa" model... 40,000 units.
A sure fire hit with the Taliban!"

ROFL!!!!!!!!!