Thursday, August 7, 2008
KIM Jong IL Offers Advice on Borders
Meanwhile somewhere in the "Land of the Morning Missile Launch", north of the 38th Parallel in fabulous Norf Korea, we find Great Reader KIM Jong IL back on the cumpooter.....
KIM- Hmmm...stupid. Why can't they see it, General Wang?
WANG- See what, your Greatness?
KIM- Americrans and Mexicrans at it again on border. Mexiclan Army is got US Borders Patrol held up at gun point. This is so EZ to fixate.
WANG- How Sir?
KIM- Just open Borders to all Mexico peoples who wants to read books in USA. Or open Borders Book Stores in Mexicrow! It'll make mucho dinero (Mexico talk for $) looong time!
WANG- Sir? Why would you think that Mexican nationals are crossing the Rio Grande in order to go read books?
KIM- Mexican TV.
WANG- Mexican TV?
KIM- (Kim clicking through channels on remote)
Look at these wrestlers wearing masks on a morning TV tawk show! Pathetic.
click...Now here's a bunch of dudes dressed like Slim Whitman playin tuba's. Good grawd.
click...Look! It's Liberace reportings the weather and he even reads palms! Oooowee.
click...Now it's a bunch of shitty used SUV's and mini-vans for sale with the Slim Whitman dudes singing and playing guitars. Sorry asses.
click....Oh fruck!...Now it's a Viva Obama commercial...
WANG- Stop! Stop! For God's sake STOP!
KIM- I told you Mexican TV sucked and would make book lovers outta anyone.
WANG- It's not that...you just launched a volley of rockets!
KIM- Those dumb remotes all look the same.
*hat tip to Hammer for the inspiration of this post