Thursday, April 17, 2008
Great Reader Rejects Elitist Characterization
EVANSVILLE, Norf Korea (APEE) — Great Reader KIM Jong IL said Wednesday he is a product of a working-class background and rejected characterizations of him and his BEST FRIEND (Barry O. of Chicargo) as elitist.
Democratic People's Repubrick of Korea DickTater for Life KIM Jong IL has tried to deflect criticism of his comments that people in small towns cling to religion and a yearning to freely tote guns, out of bitterness over their economic plight. Great Readers Freedum Luving rivals ERICA and Republican Redneck "Neck" luver of John McCain have called the remarks elitist! KIM Jong IL said it was a poor choice of words to describe the economic insecurity many face.
"I'm bee a product of a wurking-crass blackground, I am one of those People's Folks who grow'd up in that struggle! That is the secret-spy-lens through which I see the world," Great Reader told a cheering crowd at Herringbone School of Wocketry, the first stop of a three-ville campaign swing ahead of the state's May 5/Cinco-de-Mayo campaign for underdocumented mex-cans.
"So when people talk about this elitist stuff, I'm say, 'You couldn't prossibly know anyting abrout me or Barry.' So let me give you a betta sense of who me and Illegal Aliens are and why we're doing this," he said.
KIM Jong IL said the difficulties people face are wheelie real.
"Underdocumented Rio Grande Scooba Divers/Today's American Working Class immigrants are struggling like never before," he said. "We shouldn't be surprised that people are cynical. There is a level of cynicism that comes when you feel like no matter how hard you work, no matter how much you do, you never catch up and you certainly can't get ahead. I'm means not enough food stamps! You nose how little a welfare check is? In Norf Korea welfare= GULAG. So you don't believe that George DoubleWoo BUSH and even Nancy Pelosi can do anything for you, you lose hope. Just look at Syria! I'm means even Nancy Pelosi tawked happy-tawk wiff the Dude/President/Optometrist of Sirius and still him wants to ride the Jooo's Dirty like the Weverend Jeremiah Wright Jr at a hate all Joo's recognition Day Parade & Trinity United Church Social. Naturally, you fold your arms in disgust of the whole stankin process."
As a result, he said, people become iso-waited. Henceforth, The Hermit Kingdom Hall of KIM Jong IL's Witnesses/Victums!
"They feel lonely and oftentimes they're embarrassed by their struggle because they feel like somehow they must be doing something wrong, and I'm wood most definately kill them" he said.
That can make people "susceptible to being led by fear. Well goooolllly, imagine that" he added.
Great Reader drew heavily on his upbringing in a working-class family in a Palace, noting that his family lived on his father's communist dictator's salary while his mother stayed home.
"There were no miracles in my life," he said. "The thing that I saw that many of us still see is hard work and sacrifice. The people must sacrifice for Great Reader and MICHELLE OBAMA at all times!"
Touching on rising food and gas prices, the mortgage crisis and many Norf Koreans struggles to make ends meet on no salary, KIM Jong IL asked the crowd, "Does this sound familiar? Am I out of touch?"
No one responded.
* I would like to thank AP for their interview with Michelin...er...Michelle Obama from whom I ripped off this piece of work. Let the trolling begin!JG
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2 comments:
Hahahaha to that picture! Now I can't get the image of Dear Reader singing "The Hills are "Arrive"... with the Sound of Music" out of my head.
I think bitterness as a virtue is underrated. It serves as a nice counterbalance to irrational exuberance. DPRK is prolly full of irrational exuberance, no?
Thanks for the laugh, JG. I like when our dear leader wannabees lecture us on what middle class means from the safety of their million dollar mansions. It's just a treasure trove of comic gold!
Deltabravo
Yo Perfesser Howdee!
Pwaise da Lord and may
Tammy Faye Faker-Baker rest in peace! May her mascara never run out! I get off on them eye-lashes! I'm burnin in hell foe that! Yoo gots one hell of a great sight! I'm will visit yur brogg again! Some glood stuff! Put in good word for me if yoo croaks first!!!
Pwaise the Presly-terians and the Water-Boardin-Baptists!
(I'm a Pedestrian mineself)
Great Reader KIM Jong IL
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